Momentum vs stepping stones…
Definition of momentum: the impetus and driving force gained by the development of a process or course of events.
Our pastor just celebrated 20 years of ministry at the same church this past Sunday. It was a blessing to share in the story that celebrated his consistent ministry at the same place. It made me look back on the journey that God has been taking me on so far. In October I will begin year 10 of serving as girls minister at Brentwood Baptist. I had no idea that I would still be here at Brentwood Baptist almost 10 years after I started. I’m so glad that I’ve been able to see what girls ministry looks like at the same place for this many years. I can only imagine the momentum that people like my pastor can experience as they’ve journeyed with our congregation for 20 years! For those of you that have just peeled into your first days, months, or years of working with girls whether in a ministerial role, director role, or volunteer role, I wanted to share some things that I’ve learned in hopes that it will be an encouragement for you.
1. There will be hard days.
That may not seem encouraging but hopefully it reminds you that you are not alone in this journey. Ministry to girls and their families can be hard. If you heard that it’s all about drinking coffee and being the coolest person in the lives of teenaged girls—well someone gave you the wrong job description. Those tough times may come with girls, with parents, with volunteers, with your staff, or even with yourself—but they do not last.
2. Develop a prayer team
Make sure you have a group of people that you trust to truly pray for you. Pick a few from your church, but choose people that know you apart from the ministry. It allows you to share things that you may be required to be guarded about (not confidential items with students or families, but regarding your struggles and pains).
3. Have a mentor.
Always be willing to learn. I have known people that have asked me to mentor them, but when it came down to it, they were not very teachable. Continue to learn as you journey down this road of girls ministry. I’m still learning tons so trust me, you don’t know it all.
4. Stop looking around at what other people are doing.
I know it gets distracting and you hear that so and so just had this cool gig or this girls minister just got asked to do this, but you are not called to be them at their place of ministry. God is at work in you where you are, so be present there. You’ll miss you’re own story if you’re not careful.
5. Boundaries.
Make sure you have boundaries in place so that you are able to be refilled and away from girls ministry sometime during the week. This is important to your health but also it is a weekly reminder that the world keeps spinning without you.
6.Keep thirsting for God’s word for yourself.
Don’t just be a straw that transfers God’s truth to another. Make sure you are soaking up God’s word for yourself.
7.Take a spiritual prayer retreat on regular basis
Our pastor has made it mandatory that our ministers take spiritual prayer retreats regularly. He recognizes the necessity of such days in the life of those who give their lives away daily. You need to have days where you don’t work on girls ministry. Days where you don’t meet with people. Days when you only spend completely in communion with God. Sometimes we can trick ourselves into thinking our value and identity comes from what we do and not from whose child we are. It’s such an important time, and ironically it’s a day that often gets neglected if it’s not scheduled.
8. Begin to look at your place in ministry as a crockpot, not a microwave.
So often, we want to see results now. But what if I told you that serving alongside the same people for a considerable time brings richness that you would never know if you just zapped the experience with a microwave. Sometimes we are looking for the next big thing and we’ve been taught that bigger is better or “moving up” is the best thing. Sometimes you may be called to “stay” in a place for a long while and if that’s the case, let me assure you that there is a momentum that occurs when you are willing to say no to stepping stones, and yes to digging roots. Some people don’t have this calling, but if you do—-it will be worth the wait.
I’m sure there are so many other things I could share that I’ve learned, but those are top of mind tonight. I’m excited to see what happens as I continue to journey with these girls and their families over the next several years. I continue to learn new things on this journey. For example, we just found out we’re expecting! So I soon will be able to minister as a mom and I’m delighted to see how having my own child adds a richness to the ministry God has called me to. Should be a fun beginning to a new decade! What about you? What encouragement do you have for those who are just beginning this journey?
A Blog talk radio interview with Amy Pierson on mentoring girls
Amy Pierson has become a great friend in ministry. We actually connected through the mygirlsministry.com social network first, and then we officially met at Lifeway’s Girls Ministry Forum in 2010 where we taught conferences next to one another. Amy is a talented author but more than that, she is a friend to me in girls ministry and I love that we share that passion to disciple girls. Here is a radio show interview I did with Amy that was originally aired on the girls ministry network. I hope you enjoy.
Cookies: a great recipe for getting to know girls
1 Comment 
Posted under: Featured, Girls Ministry, Girls Ministry Activities, Mentoring, volunteers
This past Sunday two of our 8th grade girls lifegroup leaders put together a Valentine’s eve cookie party. I joined them after the damage had already begun on the kitchen table. You probably heard us sometime during the afternoon. You must have heard us, as those 12 or so 8th grade girls hit decibels that broke the sound barrier at least 5 or 6 times. You know how it goes. You start making cookies. You start giggling. You start singing, and it quickly escalates into a sound barrier breaking rendition of “I am a C. I am a C-H. I am a C-H-R-I-S-T-I-A-N.” Amazing. And I loved how not only did we make heart cookies, but we had Yoda, Bobba Fett, and a Storm trooper that showed up in our cookie tray as well. Why do we do it? Because in the margins of making cookies, we share more than a recipe. We share time. We share turns getting to hear what’s going on, or what one girls likes, or what one girl doesn’t like. We share laughter. And as a result, we’ve shared life together. Walking into that group on Wednesday night doesn’t seem like a sterile classroom anymore. There’s growth happening even more now because these two lifegroup leaders took time to bring girls to their home and make cookies for an afternoon. I love that our leaders see the importance of doing life outside of our scheduled time on Wednesday. Thanks Kathy and Debbie! And thanks to many other leaders who do this on a regular basis. I just didn’t call attention to you today. BUT it’s coming:)
How to partner with parents in mentoring their daughter
Some of my very favorite people in ministry are parents I know. They are my friends and they are on “Team Amy-Jo”. They are people that I can count on to pray for me, with me, and sometimes they pray without me even knowing. These parents allow me to come alongside of them and co-minister. It’s a special bond. I get the unique vantage point of watching them love on their daughters through the teenage years, and I get to encourage both the daughter and parent as those times can sometimes be trying. I am thankful for the partnership we have. I am grateful for the friendship we have. I say this because I realized this is something I may take for granted, and something I haven’t truly spent a great deal of time talking about here. I must say that I first learned this possible partnership from when I was a teen myself. My amazing mother took the time to allow some women to come into our lives to walk alongside of us. They are my mother’s friends, and they are my mentors. Even as some moved to places like Africa or Mississippi, they remained in my life as my girl’s minister’s. Even to this day, these women hold a special place in our family. My husband affectionately calls them my Obi-wan-kenobi and my Yoda. I love you both Bonita and Robin.
Here’s what I’ve learned from them about partnering with parents to minister to girls:
1. Reinforce the values that the Godly parent is trying to encourage within the daughter. I never received mixed messages from my mentors and my mom. They were on the same page. It made such a difference to hear something my mom had said to me, show up naturally in conversation with my mentor. I knew they were on the same page.
2. It’s okay to hang out together with the mom and daughter. Sometimes as a girls minister we may shy away from hanging out with students and their parents. However, if you can, try to schedule some girl time with both the daughter and the mom. It can be a healthy time of modeling a Christian friendship with the daughter. I loved hanging out with my mom and my mentors. It wasn’t often, but we would sometimes invite them over for lunch or dinner after a church event.
3. Be present, not possessive. The women that mentored me listened to what was going on in our family. They didn’t overstep their bounds and so my mother was never threatened by their presence in my life. I think that came from their ability to listen and be present without being possessive. Now don’t get me wrong, I knew I was their “girl” and I am shaped today because of their influence in my life, but they did not try to replace my mother. Instead, they worked alongside of her in a harmonious way that allowed me to see different role models during my formative years.
4. Call out the good things you see God doing in both the daughter and the mom. These women have been amazing at not only encouraging me and calling out the good things they see God doing in me, but also doing the same with my mom. I know they love us both. It was important for me especially because I had a difficult relationship with my father who didn’t really know how to use his words to encourage. To hear my mentors talk to my mom about what they saw in me was so encouraging. And to hear them say things about my mother only reinforced the value of my mom in my eyes.
There is so much more I’ve learned from the women who walked alongside of my mom and I, but these were the things that popped into my head after a long day. I hope you get to be a Robin or Bonita to a girl and her mom. It’s a forever friendship you won’t regret making.
Who needs encouragement? This girl, and that girl…and that girl…
The following post is an article that was received from guest contributor Tiffany Haynes during her mission trip to Casper, Wyoming. I think you’ll find it’s a great reminder of how we as leaders need the encouragement of fellow laborers and if we need encouragement…think how much more our students may need encouragement from their leaders. The word encourage means to fill one with courage. As you read Tiffany’s post, perhaps it will jog your memory of some of your summer roadtrips and remind you of that student that God is calling you to fill with courage.
It’s 2:22 p.m. and we’re still in Kansas. Seven hours ago we rolled out of the church parking lot in
a 25 passenger bus filled with 17 students and six adults headed towards Casper, Wyoming. Each
year we take students on a mission trip and this year we’re headed to work with the World Changers
organization in the city of Casper for four days. It’s definitely a trip of mixed emotion. In years passed, my good friend Kathy would always make these long bus trips along side of me. We’d talk and laugh for miles on end. Beautiful memories were formed on these journeys and such a deep bond was created. Last October, Kathy met her sweet Jesus.
The seat next to me will forever be vacant – not because no one sits there, but because no one will ever replace that which she gave me. Kathy could love with such fervency and grace that it is nearly indescribable. She was an encourager to the core.
As I scan the faces on the bus I think about what each student brings on board – not just their luggage and sleeping bag, but what is carried in their hearts. Are they feeling the same mixed emotion I am? Are they well-focused after weeks of preparing for this trip? This week holds not only a lot of sweat, short nights, and needed caffeine hits, but workings within the soul. Many students will be seeking God for direction in their life, renewal in their walks, and peace back home when they return.
Right before we left another youth leader told me, “I’m going to need encouraging on this trip.” Don’t we all feel like that sometimes? There just never seems to be enough people who encourage with intensity in this world. It’s important as our students pursue God that we encourage them through their voyage. While they seek immediate answers and fixes, we must be ready to remind them to persevere.
I love a song Addison Road sings called This Little Light of Mine. Its lyrics prompt us of the light we are to shine because Christ is illuminated in us. One of my favorite verses says: “One day there will be no more pain, and we will finally see Jesus’ face, so until then I’m going to try to brave the dark and let my little light shine.”
Brave the dark, leaders. We must stand firm for the generation rising up behind us and speak Truth into their lives. You have been called to shine your light in a pitch black world, so let your light shine in your sphere of influence. First Thessalonians 5:14 serves as the perfect reminder: “Brothers and sisters, we urge you to warn those who are lazy. Encourage those who are timid. Take care of those who are weak. Be patient with everyone.” That sums up our role as ministers to our girls, doesn’t it? Our girls
need to be reminded that they are beautiful – without make-up. They need to be reminded that their feet may stink but their excitement is contagious and will permeate the lives of others. They need to be reminded that they too carry the flame.
HOMEWORK MONDAY: What infrastructure are you building for the girls in your ministry?
I was on vacation this week and didn’t get to post homework for homework thursday but I have some for you to do…watch this video and then prayerfully begin thinking through what biblical foundational truths you are giving to your girls or daughters on a regular basis? Are you allowing them to pick and choose topics that blow with the wind or are you providing a systematic spiritual nutrition much like the food pyramid?
Keeping our “experiences” in check when mentoring girls.
Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith. (Heb 13:7).
The most important thing is putting women in and around the girls ministry that get God’s word in their lives and girls can see the outcome of that in the way they live their everyday lives. Don’t let YOUR PAST EXPERIENCES become your primary girlsministry tool.
Some questions to ask regarding when to use a life experience:
1. Am i sharing this to bring attention to myself?
2. Are there parts of this experience that do not need to be disclosed? Too much information for a certain age group to hear?
3. Am I sharing this experience because it has been healed, redeemed, transformed or is this possibly a therapy session for me?
4. Sharing an experience brings a certain level of authenticity at times so I’m not saying never share personal stories, just ask yourself—what spiritual truth does this experience reinforce as I mentor this sister in Christ?
GUEST BLOGGER: Spiritual Jaws need Meat
Tiffany Haynes has done us the favor of sharing another guest blog for us. I am so very thankful because girlsminister.com has been very busy going from mission week to summer camp to VBS to missions week and I haven’t had a chance to take a breath and process all that God has been doing. Thanks to Tiffany, we have a post this week!
If you haven’t met Tiffany, check out her other articles here.
Exposing God’s Word To Students
One of common understandings we know regarding the nature of girls v. boys is that girls typically mature faster than boys. However, one thing we often fail to remember is that this truth is not only relevant from a physical and emotional standpoint, but also from a spiritual standpoint.
As we teach our girls, we need to remember that providing them with spiritual meat to chew on is muy Bueno (that’s “very good” in Spanish. See, I did pay attention in college!). As my friend, Gregg, states – we must tear muscle to build muscle. We need to be giving our girls’ spiritual jaws a hefty workout by tossing God’s meaty Word their way. Too often we get skittish of going “too deep” in our topics with them. The bad part is, we’re so anxious about the deep waters that we over-compensate and then find ourselves (and our students) standing in the shallow end of the pool.
Like it says in Colossians 2:7 (NIV), we need to be “rooted and built up in Him.” It’s important to expose girls to the depth of our Lord and Christ. Oftentimes, we take a reverse approach and try to address a common issue by crafting scripture around the issue. We work diligently at wrapping the message in a ritzy bow in order increase the appeal of our words instead of just allowing God’s Word to do the work for us (check out Nehemiah 8:3).
As leaders, our purpose is to expose our girls to God’s Word and then allow His Holy Spirit to equip. In order to expose them more, consider teaching from an “expository” approach. Expository is just a fancy word for going through a book of the Bible and describing, informing, and defining the author’s writings – and referencing other Scriptures to reinforce the context – to the reader. This will definitely stretch your own spiritual muscles as you study and prepare for these types of messages (try using commentaries, concordances, and other credible study sources); but remember, it was never God’s intention that we play hop-scotch with His Word.
Deep Calleth Deep
Back in January I began doing a study on the book of Exodus. I read nearly every day out of this 384 page book with insanely tiny print. It’s July now and I’m only half way through it! There’s much to chew on, but it has truly been the most breathtaking ride to study God’s Word in such intimate detail. The parallelism between the Old Testament and the New Testament has simply rocked my face off and I pray leaders would help their students learn to study and known God’s Word with such depth.
We truly serve a God of details. Did you know that the Ark in Exodus was made of “shittim wood” (also known as acacia)? Funky word and can easily be glossed over, but it was said to be from a tree which many thought to be imperishable and could thrive in very dry conditions. Furthermore, it’s interesting to find that when this tree is pierced, it actually oozes and produces a type of gum which is used in medicinal preparations. Does this “piercing” remind you of anything? Ah, yes, our Jesus who was pierced for us and whose blood flowed forth from His side. Through His death, we experience healing. What a phenomenally intricate reassurance to know how God chose the very wood the Ark would be comprised of in order to foreshadow what Christ would achieve for us thousands of years later.
Do our girls clearly understand the intensity of our Father? How can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? (Romans 10:14) As leaders involved in girls ministry, it’s so vital to ensure we don’t linger in the shallows too long, but teach our girls to immerse themselves in the rushing waters of Christ.
Good words Tiffany! What about you? How are you seeing God make His words jump off the pages and bring the spiritual nutrition you need to do what He’s called you to do?
How are you leading the girls that God places in your life to see God’s word as the meaty meal they need?
How are you helping them to excercise their spiritual jaws and really start chewing on God’s word?
Getting girls to click into your student ministry…
I remember the first day on the job as a girlsminister. It was our fall retreat! I was surrounded by cliques of girls and I couldn’t figure out how to get inside of one of those circles. They all seemed to be looking at me—the new girl—and sizing me up. Didn’t they realize I was an adult and the girls minister?! I think I thought there would be instant connection like there was when I worked summers at the large Christian camps. Just because I was camp staffer, I often had students come up and start talking with me about some pretty heavy things. But, this was not how it was on my first day on the job. There were some sweet people that tried to come over and introduce themselves but mostly it was cliques. Then on Sundays and Wednesdays there was the hallway that I renamed “The Gauntlet”. It was a horrible hallway because you had to walk down it to get into the sunday school room and lining every square inch of wallspace were groups of girls that weren’t talking to me but to each other. Very intimidating! I’m very thankful for the gauntlet and for that first fall retreat because it reminds me of what it feels like to be new in our student ministry. It’s scary!
That’s why I worked with some leaders and some girls to have a strategy to receive new girls into our student ministry. The idea is the 1-2-3 CLICK! method. Now understand that we don’t just go around saying “hey new girl…this is how we’re going to get you connected in three clicks.” This is just something that I have used to explain to students or leaders to help them understand how to continue reaching out to new people that have been introduced to our student ministry.
Here’s the basic premise:
1. Meet a girl who is unconnected and introduce her to her peer group.
2. Take her to coffee or introduce her to a peer or leader which will take her to coffee to get to know her.
3. Get her connected to a lifegroup of girls who have hung out with her or introduce her to a relationship building catalyst like Snowball Girls Retreat. AND CLICK! She’s in.
I have observed that typically after 3 intentional relationship connections from you the leader, to a healthy peer group, to a bonding event or small group and the student will click into a place they feel welcomed and known within your student ministry. How do you get girls connected and help them feel safe, loved and known in your student ministry?
2010 Girls Ministry Forum for leaders and girls
I’m excited to be leading a conference for the Girls Ministry Forum at Lifeway in February 26-27. I would love to take some students and leaders from our church with me. If you are interested in attending, let me know. If you don’t go to Brentwood Baptist and are interested—you need to be there. I know Shelley Johnson is a great worship leader—not to mention there are some other great conference leaders to help facilitate some great conversations if you are wanting encouragement as a leader who works with girls or if you are a student leader. That’s the neat thing about this event—it’s for both adult leaders and girls who are leaders to their peers. So I hope that you will make it a priority to be in Nashville for this event. Click on the link below to register or if you are a Brentwood Baptist leader…send me an email or reply to this post and we’ll see if we can get a group together.
- Girardier 2.0 update: we're having a boy! Technology was so good we could even see black rimmed glasses and converse shoes:). #fb
- RT @mikeglenn: New Post by @amyjogirardier - girls minister of @brentwoodbc on Self Esteem - http://ow.ly/6IErg #truthfulconversations
- Proud of the students I prayed with this morning at their school flagpole. Now I'm moving to breakfast. See you at the Puffy Muffin;).
Calendar Archives
| M | T | W | T | F | S | S |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| « Jan | ||||||
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | ||
| 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 |
| 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |
| 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 |
| 27 | 28 | 29 | ||||
Archives
Categories
Girlsministry
