Girlsminister.com talks Halloween + costumes+ girls= ???
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Posted under: Featured, Girls Ministry, Girls Ministry Activities, Pop Culture
Cady’s thoughts: in the real world Halloween was a time for little kids to dress up in scary costumes. in girl world it was the one night a year a girl could dress like a total slut and no other girls could say anything about it. The hard core girls just wore lingerie and some form of animal ears. unfortunately no one told me this rule so i showed up like this.
I remember the first time that I first heard this quote from Mean Girls and thought, “Wow. Someone really captured what I have been seeing over the years.” I remember our church had an alternative halloween event for youth where you had to dress as your favorite biblical character. Of course 98% of the girls chose Esther, but then there was always that one girl who chose to really live on the edge and don a bathrobe portraying Bathsheba. Nope—that wasn’t me. I always liked to pick the obscure people like Rhoda the servant girl. (look her up–she’s real.)
My church leaders never began a top 5 list of biblical costumes that girls should not be allowed to show up to do the apple dunk in. Just for kicks,this is what I think that list would have looked like:
5. Rahab
4. Bathsheba
3. Woman at the well
2. Potiphar’s wife
1. Eve before the fall
I hope that our readers will choose to speak into the lives of girls this Halloween to begin some conversations regarding their costume choices. Or perhaps we can just hope the coolest girl in school latches on to my 2010 secret Halloween viral campaigns:
“Hazmat suits = the new bunny costume”
“covered head to toe is the way to go”
“mummies & modest monsters= eye candy”
Or maybe the following web badges will start spreading onto the “cool girl’s” facebook profile pics:
But in all seriousness, here’s an activity you can do with some of the girls you mentor to begin talking about Halloween Costumes:
Have girls use markers, pencils, glue, and old magazines to design a halloween costume for each member of their family—including pets.
Use those drawings to begin to talk about why they chose those costumes.
ASK: Did those costumes represent something about that person?
What do you think your costume represents about you?
Why do you think girls choose to wear costumes that are often innapropriate?
What do you think the message is regarding those costume choices?
How does Ephesians 3:5 impact the costume we may choose to wear?
web 2.0 suicide: are your students on the digital ledge?
The term social suicide is one that has been around for awhile. I looked up the most popular definition on The Urban Dictionary and this is the one that rose to the top:
SOCIAL SUICIDE: commiting an act or acts that alienates one from their social scene or social circleto kill one’s social life
Example: John commited social suicide by asking out his ex-girlfriends best friend barely a week after they broke up.Example: Veronica is commiting social suicide by talking behind her friends backs.
- Create online hours and offline hours—-one of my friends wrote on the pillows of our senior girls last year this quote that stayed in my mind forever—”Nothing good happens after midnight”. That goes for the internet and even begins earlier…don’t go on the networks past 10. Often times you start posting things or saying things that you would not want to be said and those comments can’t be erased very easily.
- Take some digital breaks each week — If you begin to feel like your online presence is becoming demanding or even addictive, begin to schedule digital breaks or sabbaths. Tell someone or even post in your status that you are “off this week” or “this day”. Don’t let your profile or status own you.
- Consider the legacy… It’s hard to believe that a digital presence could cause havoc on your physical presence but it can. Your digital fingerprint leaves a legacy…think about what your profile will say when you begin to try and shake it, or change it.
What other boundaries do you have or tell your students to think about when they are online? Share them below.
When befriend…moves to unfriend. How to handle a digital diss.
It’s not something I am proud of, but I did a search for someone that I needed to get in touch with the other day, and I knew that I had been facebook friends with them…but I couldn’t find them in my friends list. I did another search and it finally clicked—I’ve been unfriended!!! Wow. I’ve heard of this, but it was still something that took me aback. I found myself spiraling into a series of questions: “What did I do? How can I make this right? How do I respond to them in the real world? ” It was then that I stopped myself on that last question…In the words of my mother: “Whoa Nelly. Settle down there!” Why was I having such a breakdown over this digital diss? Why was my digital ego so fragile? I realized that it truly is a crazy world when we can sever friendships without a word but merely a click of a button. So how to we respond as Christians in a digital relationship? As I looked at that term that has developed on facebook for this action of digital dissing (UNFRIEND), I realized that the action in reverse is BEFRIEND. When I am UNFRIENDED in the real world, my reaction should be to BEFRIEND. We should literally Proverbs 17:17 them. (A friend loves at all times) Therefore, when I am UNFRIENDED on facebook, I should still be a friend who loves at all times. Even though I don’t understand why the unfriending happened…I still have a responsibility to love them—not slander them on facebook, not message them to say “I never liked you anyway”. I find it very interesting that even The Urban Dictionary figured it out:
The oposite of befriending someone. When you unfriend someone you don’t necessarily become their enemy per say, but you are just no longer their friend, sorta like just distancing yourself from them until you befriend them again.
Well they kinda got it. At least they realized that Befriending is the opposite of Unfriending. So, should you experience a drive-by unfriending…or even if you see it coming…may you respond and teach others to respond as scripture tells us we should. Love at all times! Easier said than done, but hopefully it will be a reminder of what to do if an unfriending becomes a reality for you.
Silly bandz: A Nashville trend? or have you seen this too?
I’m interested to know if this trend is local or national. The trend: wearing these rubber bracelets that when pulled off of your wrist take on the shape of an animal or symbol. Our girls are going crazy over them and it’s the first trend I’ve seen in a long time that has trickled up to older girls. You can buy them at a teacher store and now they are available in some select stores. So anyone else seeing this? Girls are swapping them like crazy. Some girls have like 60 of these things. Here’s a picture of one that is the shape of a person. I’ve been seeing it since September but now it’s moving to a Beanie Baby collecting level. Let me hear from you about if this is sweeping your girls ministries as well. Also if you want to order them: 
You can find them here
Princess deconstruction
Some of my friends in ministry know that I have an on-going dialogue to challenge the princess perception problem that is seeping into our churches. So they sent me the following link deconstructing the Disney Princesses and Princes. I’m putting this up here just for conversation. They were being funny girl leaders (Liz and Amy) asking me to use this in our lifegroup studies but as I started looking at it, it was interesting. As Girls leaders, we need to be clear that as we begin to use the Princess label to our girls, we need to realize that their perception of a princess may be skewed as they reflect on the fairytale princess stories they grew up on. Their stories are very different from the way that the daughter’s of the King of King’s stories should go—don’t you think? 
A New moon (Twilight) video cliff note edition.
Well it’s November. Not only is it “No-shave-mber”, it’s also the month many teenaged girls have been counting down the days for because it holds the release of the new Twilight Saga movie: New Moon. Yes the anticipation has been building. You will start seeing the Twitter trending include New Moon and New Moon kissing scene on a regular basis. But what is this movie all about? What is this whole Team Edward and Team Jacob thing? Well in this movie, Bella experiences a vampire dumping that sends her reeling into depression. The things that Bella does to try to gain closeness to Edward would have me send her to counseling, but that’s not what happens. She develops a friendship with Jacob that helps her limp through the Edwardless days, and begin to get mixed feelings about him as well–BUT there is always the pining for Edward. She literally stops her life and stops hanging out with friends…and in fact—finds that when she is almost killed, she hears Edward in her head. Many of us have experienced the pain of a relationship ending, but it’s Bella’s way of dealing with it that makes me fearful that girls will allow their future dumpings to cause them to grieve in similar ways instead of finding healthy ways to move forward. Stephanie Meyers has modeled the storyline to have a Romeo and Juliet-esque type of romance, and so many twi-hards realize this is the sad part of the twilight saga. But you as a Mom, parent, youth worker, or friend may have opportunity to speak some hope or have some really good conversations about what happens when we do lose those friends or relationships.
What are some positive ways of dealing with that sort of loss? How have you felt like Bella, and how can you protect your heart from finding yourself in a similar sort of grieving? We’ll have a discussion guide later in the month. Here’s is a cliff notes video synopsis of New Moon through the perspective of a sarcastic girls minister. It’s about 10 minutes but hopefully you will enjoy it.
Girlsminister on the road: A New Moon (Twilight) synopsis from Amy Jo Girardier on Vimeo.
Twilight wins MTV best movie. Check out the New Moon trailer.
Keeping you up to date on the Twilight happenings. If you want to see the trailer for the new movie, here it is. We’ll be sure to give you a girlsminister.com review on book 2 before the movie so you can be ready to discuss before 11.20.09.
Dora the explorer grows up…what’s she looking for now?
Have you heard recently about Dora the Explorer getting a new look?
Dora the Explorer is growing up. The bilingual pre-school favorite is getting a tween makeover thanks to Mattel and Nickelodeon. Besides having a new line of toys and products to sell, Mattel wants Dora to age with her audience and “experience the new things” fans are going through.
I know that there have been a lot discussions among the mom networks about if the teen Dora is dressed provacatively. I have other questions about the intent of a teen Dora. I know as an Aunt, my nieces both watch Dora. I have thought it was great for them to allow Dora to take them on an exploration of her world and culture. They have learned and have been entertained. I just hope for their sake that teen Dora doesn’t take them on an exploration to help her look for her Identity, Significance, and Purpose. It will be interesting to see what Nickelodeon decides to use Teen Dora to help viewers explore. It’s kinda sad that even the animated world of girldom apparently is being asked to grow up. Poor Dora…I just hope she doesn’t start hanging out with The Bratz dolls or start watching Gossip Girl. Interested to see what your thoughts on a Teen Dora might be.
Girls Minister on the road: The Twilight Episode
Girls Minister on the Road: The Twilight edition pt 1 from Amy Jo Girardier on Vimeo.
This is a brief and not complete synopsis of the twilight book 1 for dads, youth ministers, and moms that don’t have time to read the book. I do encourage you to read the book so you can talk with your daughter or girls in your ministry about it because I think it will allow for some awesome conversations. If you need some insight, go to our twilight discussion guide post and read the post about the twilight discussion for moms and daughters I posted on there to go along with this video. This will just tell you the main plot. I have left out the ushy gushy love scenes and just cut to the meat of the story. Enjoy!
GIRLS MINISTER POP CULTURE MOMENT: if you seek amy, you won’t find her.
Well Britney has done it again. It was earlier this month that I was working out at the gym with my bootcamp friends and our trainer turned on a song. Chris, one of the guys, commented on the song to divert us from the pain we were experiencing during our weight lifting. He said—”what does this song even mean, and why is she looking for amy?”. At that moment, Christy gasped and said “OH…this is that song with the secret vulgar message in the chorus.” She told us to repeat the chorus “If you seek Amy” rapidly over and over again and we would know what Britney was wanting us to hear. It was a sentence expressing a sexual advance. The chorus doesn’t make sense—all of the boys and all of the girls are begging to if you seek amy. (The F bomb+ me is the hint if you still are at a loss.)
Britney has gotten a lot of flack and also some praise with her witty hide and seek lyric game. Britney has gone through a lot and so this post is not an attempt to slam her. I do think that it is interesting that while her songs and antics continue to get her attention, she is still playing her own hide and seek game with her identity. She hasn’t found it in a career. She hasn’t found it in a relationship. She hasn’t found it in being a mother. All of those things can be good things, but for anyone these good things will unravel if we put our identity into them. I love what St. Augustine says:
You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in Thee.
It is my prayer that for Britney and girls everywhere, that they will find rest and completeness when they place their hearts in God’s care. It is my prayer that they will seek their Identity, Significance, and Purpose through His eyes and not fill their lives with empty relationships, dreams, and throw-away moments.
- Girardier 2.0 update: we're having a boy! Technology was so good we could even see black rimmed glasses and converse shoes:). #fb
- RT @mikeglenn: New Post by @amyjogirardier - girls minister of @brentwoodbc on Self Esteem - http://ow.ly/6IErg #truthfulconversations
- Proud of the students I prayed with this morning at their school flagpole. Now I'm moving to breakfast. See you at the Puffy Muffin;).
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